What does your relationship look like, with your spouse?
What does your relationships look like, with your friends and family?
And who is in the middle of them all?
Relationships, I think, can be one of the most difficult developments you will ever have to face during your life time on Earth.
Why I say this, is that the world has formed its own opinion on how these relationships should look like, and often we catch ourselves comparing our relationships with the worldly view.
Doubt kicks in when something seems off, because “in the real world”, opinions are given on situations from an outsider point of view.
I think that’s why it is so crucial to have God as your centre point: to keep the focus point, your plumb line, intact.
Opinions are often a deal breaker: they either hurt you or it uplift you.
That’s why we need to make sure that we are surrounded with people who bring in a positive influence, in our lives.
So often, when someone new enters our life, we get side tracked. But, the more you get to know them, the more you get to see who they really are.
We need to make sure that our friends are God-breathed.
We need to pray about every relationship and every opinion given over our life.
We need to ask God if this is truly from Him, if this is truly what He wants for our life.
We need to make sure that our relationships are built on a strong foundation.
There’s going to come a time in your life where God is going to put a situation in your life to make your relationships stronger.
He’s going to put situations in your life where you are going to gain more wisdom over past relationships, and the knowledge to do it right, or even better, the next time around.
I want to use two situations in my personal life to demonstrate just how uplifting or damaging a relationship, and the opinions formed around it, can be.
First of all, I’m going to share my story on my biological mother.
I was adopted as a baby. As the years went by, without me realising, rejection crept in. The bond between my mother and I had to be broken, because my mother couldn’t financially support me as child.
It was painful, and through a very long process, healing had to begin.
I had to forgive her, but also myself.
I had to learn to trust others.
I had to learn that I don’t have to do things to impress others, to gain their love.
All this started in my adult years, where this it usually starts over a period of our entire life, from a young child right through to adulthood.
Then there is the second example, of me and my husband.
Over the past three years we have gained immense strength, and learned together, that a God-breathed relationship is truly the only way to go.
We asked God to give us counsel and direction in our lives.
We started relying on God for the answers, and not the world.
We started trusting God, instead of the world.
We started walking in obedience to what God said, in spite of what others have to say.
We let our time spent apart build our character in Christ, making us stronger together.
“When there’s a burden, married to a vision, supported by God’s provision we see a God response.”
Pierre Smith, of Every Nation Group in South Africa.
This is exactly it: when God shows you, together, then no matter the circumstance, no matter the world’s opinion, it will have a Godly response.
When God is the centre point of the relationship, then His protection will always be with you and your spouse, even when it means that time is spent apart.
A year ago, God placed America in our hearts and my husband is now currently working there.
You see our vision, and what God showed us, is that there will open a permanent door for us to be together again.
So, as we now spent time apart, it might be (temporarily) a burden, but because it was God-breathed we are seeing God’s response.
We are seeing that no matter our circumstances, and no matter what the world says, or what its opinions are, our relationships need to be Godly centred for it to work.
We need to keep focused, and keep our eye on the goal, in our relationships.
When God directs your footsteps, then He will stay in control.